This week I published my first book: Dream Big, Live Small: A Guide for Downsizing and Intentional Living.
As I saw my book cover and name pop up on Amazon, I was ridiculously excited. I had accomplished something that was important to me. It gave me a huge sense of satisfaction and it made me a little giddy. . .okay a lot giddy!
At the same time, I was terrified. What if no one reads it? What if the people who do read it hate it? What if the book is a total failure? What if people laugh at what I wrote? Rather than being discouraged by these feelings, I recognized them as a positive sign. Feeling nervous meant I was stretching myself. It meant I was trying something new. And trying something new means I am growing.
This isn’t the first time I have felt excitement and fear during my adventure. In fact, my Tiny House journey has been a complex mix of excitement and fear.
I still remember the day I saw my first Tiny House in person. I lived in Colorado, and I was lucky enough to be in the same town as the Tumbleweed Tiny House builder.
I drove up to “The Shed Yard” and saw the Tiny House on display. It was the first time I truly believed my Tiny House dream was possible. It was incredibly exhilarating.
As I opened the front door of the “model home,” I absolutely fell in love with the charm and simplicity of the space. It felt like home. I was excited and felt like I was on the right path, but at the same time I felt the fear creep in.
What if I hate living in a Tiny House? What will people think if I really go for this? How will I afford this change? All of these questions were valid, but they encouraged me to do a lot of self-reflection. They allowed me to learn more about tiny house living and about myself. My fear kept me moving in a positive direction.
I felt the same way my Tiny House was delivered. As I waited for the drivers to show up with my new home, I was ridiculously excited and hyper. I literally had an energy that was buzzing around me. I couldn’t sit still.
More than anything I remember the feeling of awe and excitement as they pulled my new home into my spot at my RV park. I knew this was the day I was going to start my new lifestyle and I was filled with gratitude. And despite the fact that I had completely committed to the change, I was nervous.
There were still lingering questions, what if I had made a mistake? What if I hated this new lifestyle? Once again, I reminded myself that if I hated my new lifestyle I could always sell the Tiny House and go get an apartment.
I think big changes in our life almost always have elements of excitement and fear. If you feel that way about a big decision or life change you are experiencing, take heart. It probably means you are moving in the right direction!